Written by Janine Slater
I didn’t know much about sex or masturbation when I bought my first vibrator. I was raised as a strict Catholic and became an adult in the early 90s. I had moved into my own apartment by the time I graduated college and I even bought my first desktop computer. I was completely clueless about the internet at the time, but what an adventure it was at that time.
I was also clueless about sex and still felt like a virgin despite having sex with a few boyfriends. I didn’t see what the big deal was about sex. It seemed to be over in minutes after a few thrusts. I even dated one of the guys for about 7 months.
Back then, we didn’t talk much about sex, and though I did some with girlfriends, it was still rather innocent. We made dirty jokes. We talked about the embarrassment of our bodies and the smell “down there” which made me too paranoid to let a guy go down on me. I wasn’t very open with my sexuality then.
I started to look up porn on the internet. I think I learned more about sex that way. This was back in 95-98 and what I really discovered was female masturbation. I know, how can I BE a female and not have masturbated? I had. I wasn’t sure what to do, how long to do it, or even what an orgasm felt like. Porn was “different” then, I looked at all kinds of photos on my dial-up computer… videos were out of the question on dial-up. Pretty girls touched themselves, and they liked it. More importantly, I learned about sex toys. I decided to buy my first vibrator and had it discreetly shipped to my apartment.
At first, I was intimidated by the vibrator. Then turning it on and holding it in my hand felt amazing. It was loud! It took all of 2 minutes for me to get naked and touch that vibrating joy to my clit. It was even amazing, it was so exciting, so intense, that I experienced my first real orgasm in a few minutes. When I say I discovered my body, that is somehow an understatement. I discovered my body, my power, and what lust felt like, and then I knew what the big deal about sex was! I’m almost embarrassed to say that I called off work the next day and masturbated multiple times, but I did! I was very pleased and happy with this purchase.
I’m an old broad now. I still have a vibrator and a husband but they aren’t in competition. I don’t need bells and whistles, the basics are fine in sex toys. Vibrators have improved a lot since then. The sound is no longer like a lawn mower and silicon is so much nicer than cold hard plastic. That first vibrator taught me many things. I started to expect more from men. I started to make my needs known in bed. I got more aggressive sexually, and it really helped me enjoy sex with a man more. I became less shy about asking for what I wanted and more adventurous to try new things. Being married for many years requires creativity in bed and I think that first vibrator opened my eyes to what I was missing out on!